I don’t see people in the way the world sees them.
I don’t look at others and see their flaws, their shortcomings, or the mistakes, the things that make them feel like they’ve surely failed at this thing called life. I sure as hell don’t judge someone for them either.
When I meet another person, I go straight to their soul. I learn, I listen, and I discover who and what they are, who they want to be, and what has lead them to where they are now. Not everyone wants to share their story, and I’m okay with that, too.
We don’t always choose the path that leads away from the trauma and the pain, and that stems so much from not knowing the right tools or succumbing to the stigma around wanting better for ourselves. It’s taboo to admit we need some help with our brain wiring. Why, I will never understand. If it were my heart, would you expect me to just let it give out if there were a surgery to fix it? No? Then please understand that’s what I’m doing with my brain. You know, the organ that operates my entire body system and gives my soul a place to live.
I want to know what drives them and continues to motivate them every single day to do better, be better, and know there‘s more to life than succumbing to the pain and heartache life can bring us. Different people are driven by different things and no two stories are the same. No two success and triumphant stories of making it to the other side are the same. It all takes hard work and a hell of a lot of healing.
I’ve found the amount of bravery it takes to face your past and trauma head on is incredible. I struggle so often to have the strength to keep going back, week after week, to be honest with another human being about how much I am truly struggling with life. All because I have unresolved trauma.
Next week, we decided it’s time. Time to dive into the yucky stuff. The hard, real, raw, painful, incomprehensible things that I just don’t want to face. But, who am I punishing if I choose not to do it? Not just myself, but more importantly, my children. The reason I breathe, the reason I get out of bed every single day, the reason for my existence as a whole.
These little humans are eternal. Can you grasp the depth of what that means? I hardly can, but I try. They are the one thing, earth side, that we give life to. We pour ourselves into them every single day without a second thought and would lay our lives down for them even faster. We get to keep them forever. Sometimes, for only reasons God can explain, parents outlive their children. But, with that faith, we know that they will be there waiting for us when it’s our turn, and it’s the same when we do get there first.
In this world, the only thing we know for sure, that we will have on the other side of this, is our babies. I find so much comfort in that.
The house, the car, the clothes, the gunk, will all be gone. We don’t take those things with us when we die. But our babies? They’re ours to keep forever. Infinitely, they are ours.
Not everyone’s reason for taking a different path is a child, not everyone has children.
Some have dreams. Whether they’re of a career, job, way of life, or just simply to always be doing better.
Doing better is so simple yet so difficult in the same breath. No day we’re ever presented with is ever the same, no two breaths we take match another. Every moment of every given day has something different to it, making it impossible to plan ahead and anticipate the crossroads of life that lay ahead of us.
We stand, we fall. We rise and we crumble. There will be days we are triumphant and days the darkness takes over.
No single person has ever gained the right to judge another human being for their actions or how they chose to handle their plate full of life, their story.
Next time you meet a struggling person, take the time to ask their story. Listen, imagine, empathize. We’ve all got it rough in one way or another, and everyone deserves grace and respect.
Every good & perfect gift is from above. James 1:17