I just want one normal morning.
One. Normal. Morning.
My phone didn’t ring in the middle of the night for the first time in maybe a week. But I still woke up to crazy.
Naughty kitty pushed one of the screens out in my bedroom, but he managed to get back into the house. Silly Polly, our maybe 12 ish year old kitty went out to play, too, only she couldn’t get back inside. Found her in the obnoxious green pine greenery that covers one side of our house. After lots of arguing with her, and actually having to get into the greenery and all crappy, she decided she was willing to come back in the house.
There is so much going on in our lives right now, and I just cannot keep up. Between family drama, broken bones, holiday‘s, 4 small children (I count Alvi twice), a needy husband (love you, honey), and everything else in between, I’m drowning just a little. Not a bad drowning necessarily, just an overwhelmed, lost in the chaos drowning. Life and the world don’t stop spinning just because you’re feeling overwhelmed, and it takes work to figure out how to embrace the chaos.
Embracing the chaos and mending the wounded parts of me are my two main goals while seeing my therapist. We have a game plan, she knows what I need, and I couldn’t be more thrilled to make myself uncomfortable and find healing. As crazy as that sounds, I do mean it. I’m ready to feel better, act better, be better.
We went up the road to pre-practice at the field, snuck in a nap, and the kids are currently playing in the passing shower while we wait for dinner and to see if T-Ball practice is still on or not (it’s not). Dinner is done, and we’ve decided to spend the evening on the front porch reading, playing with toys, and jumping in muddy puddles while it rains ever so steadily.
I have a nagging feeling to go clean and do all the things, but I’m forcing myself to just be. A hot cup of coffee on the front porch, kids playing in the rain, and having gratitude for all the wonderful blessings God has given me. It’s a good day to have a good day.