I missed yesterday, but that’s alright. We are slowly but surely gaining a little extra sleep night by night. I don’t suddenly feel like superwoman or anything, but it does feel like it won’t be long before I can start getting up that extra hour early to have some time for just me.
Alvi & her siblings are slowly adjusting to life with a lot less milk, and it’s not as bad as I thought. Jax is most definitely taking it the hardest, he’s our biggest milk drinker, but he’s coming to terms.
Today, my heart is heavy at the thought of someone I know distantly from school years losing her child to cancer last night. It’s times like this I question God with why. Why her, why them, why, Lord? The answer isn’t always clear, but He has a plan and we have to trust that. It feels a lot easier to say when it isn’t you that’s directly affected, but I’d hope my faith would remain as strong as these other mighty women I see as they go through the most difficult thing you can imagine.
There is a name for the loss of virtually everything, except for the loss of a child by a parent. No word could adequately describe the pain, and none should attempt to create such a word. There is a level of grief one will not truly understand unless you experience it first hand.
Tonight, I pray so hard for this sweet, beautiful girls family. I never met her, but going to school with her mom has it hitting a little closer to home. I wish so much that I could take the pain from them, provide them comfort and peace, but I always feel like I fail with words when it comes to trying to provide comfort for something I know very little about. So, this is when I turn to God. I ask Him to bring them supernatural comfort. Peace knowing that she is finally whole, and no longer in pain and suffering. Joy knowing that she’s dancing with God, and that their sweet baby touched the lives of so many people. Even souls who never even met her.
Another sweet and mighty little girl I knew also passed away recently, and especially now I can‘t help but think of the verse that was deeply meaningful to her and her ever so strong mama read to those that attended her funeral.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
Cancer is an ugly, ugly thing. But, God cannot always cure it in the way we wish. Sometimes it means that those we love and hold so dear to us have to go home to be whole again. We have to find a way to feel comfort in knowing that their journey, whatever they were put here to do, was complete. Ultimately, we have to trust His word, that He works everything out for good, and not for evil. That He has a plan, one greater than we will ever understand.
I ask all of my sweet loves to please pray for this wonderful light of a little girls family tonight, and everyday, as they find a way to cope and continue on without their little girl here with them. Prayer is a powerful thing, and it doesn’t fix things immediately, but it has the power to work in ways we don’t always understand.