On Saturday we were up at 5, driving by 6, and on the field before 7.
We took turns sitting in the car to stay warm because it is nasty cold out and it was just too much for stubborn Alvi. Averi did awesome, and we even played a game against my hometown.
Would you believe that Alvi was having one of her days? Her fits aren’t fun, but there’s also absolutely nothing I can do for her.
If you see a mom struggling with her toddler, please don’t gawk. Especially if you’re the parent of a child on the same team as mine. I know I’m not Averi’s OG momma, but I still count. We aren’t having fun, and having people gawking and judging very openly makes me uncomfortable and anxious.
Once you unleash the beast inside this mama, it’s a bit hard to come back from. I’m not judging you for anything, Karen. Can’t we all just play nice? We are adults.
We lost all 3 games Saturday, but within just a few points each one. The girls did awesome and it was a blast to be back at the fields aside from the freezing temps. I’ve never had a child that caused people to stare so much as Alvi does, but I guess God is just looking to help me grow. Maybe I’ll get a shirt that says something funny on it to the affect of their staring. Just kidding. Sort of.
By the end of the games I wasn’t feeling so hot, but I figured it was exhaustion. The kids wanted to stay with grandma so we could get up to do ball all over again in the morning without making them go and suffer, which I was completely fine with. I wasn’t home long before I started puking and realized the nasty GI sickness we just got over not that long ago was hitting me a second time. Bed before 7:30 anyone?
I missed Averi’s game on Sunday, and the kids’ second t-ball game on Sunday. To say I was and still am entirely broken over it is an understatement. There’s nothing that compares to missing out on your kids doing the fun stuff and cheering them on. I also had the means and ability to let myself rest and recover, so for once I let it happen instead of potentially infecting a ton of other people. I mean, I don’t leave the house when I’m sick anyway, but I generally have my kiddos home with me and they just kinda chill and play while I keep working and pushing myself instead of resting.
This morning I woke up feeling better, so I thought I’d get the house picked up and ready for the kids to come home. It didn’t take long to realize I’m still not feeling as good as I thought, so I’ll do a short nap and bring them home sometime this afternoon.
I know. We don’t get sick. We don’t feel allowed to be down and out. Everyone relies on us, and the whole world might burst into flames if we were to be ill. Girl, stop it. If you have someone who can keep your littles, even if it’s just for an hour, do it. Stop feeling the pressure of being super woman and thinking you have to man this ship on your own. You may be captain, but we all need help some days. The sooner you can accept that and reach out for help, the sooner you’ll see what an amazing village of people you have surrounding you. Stop mom shaming, and start mom lifting instead.